It was a dark and stormy night.
The rain fell in torrents, except when it did not, and a gust of wind inherited the space, and then the rain returned again.
Such precipitation produced roars on the rooftops, and the wind howls, as if empty without the rain. It is under such a roof that our story begins, though much unlike the roof, the courtroom was silent. One man was convicted, and though he knew that the trial would come to a bitter end, his heart was a roar.
The prosecutor held up a photograph. Swastikas, racist slogans, and entirely random phrases dotted the image.
"Is it true that you spray painted these symbols on our city walls?"
"The question is already answered, sir, for without my claim to do so, we would not have much of a trial today would we?"
Several members of the audience leaped up in outrage. They screamed for the man to be locked away, or be put to death. But the judge silenced them. The man was a clown, and his symbols, though offensive, would be taken seriously by no one. That the judge knew, and he would expect no solid punishment to be done on the man if the man were to end his antics right there. He did not.
The man pushed a button and the courtroom's wall fell away. Exposed were a series of portraits of none other than Adolf Hitler.
"Oh, I say!"
The crowd could not be contained, and the judge, being the Gallic coward of an Englishman that he is, gave in to the commoners' desires. The offender was to be put to death immediately, the case was to be closed. No more nonsense was to be expected from the individual. Peace was to be restored.
As the man was dragged to the catapult, the judge looked him one last time in the eye, and immediately withdrew. What he saw, he feared. He would try to return to his life, to resume the duty of punishing those petty crimes. But the coward would never forget his nemesis's last smile, his nemesis's last words,
"I'll be back, Robin Hayes."
And at that moment, at a location and in an event entirely unbeknownst to him, a pair of twins were born. Their names, FyodorDostoyevsky and brockobama.
